"Parents" - Anon

So the first suggestion I got was simply that one in the title. Might I compliment Mr/Mrs Anon for their elaborate nature. May you write many a novel.

Now this is a touchy subject for many. Parents could make your life a supposed living hell. Most teenagers end up wanting to kill themselves or their parents -hyperbolically speaking- simply because they are trying to pull away into independence while their parents are trying desperately to adjust to the hormones. When I was a teenager I would often voice my frustrations by telling my peers that my parents did not want the best for me, they wanted the best according to what they wrongly assume was the best. I understand now that I was a huge brat at points and I deserved most of what I got anyway. When the child tries to pull away, the natural maternal and/or paternal instinct will tell them to pull as hard as possible to keep the child from getting away, and I'm sure all will agree that they have plenty of practical examples of this phenomenon in their lives..

I am not a parent myself, but I can imagine what it's like for a parent to see their child, a person that they have raised, try to get away from them. They will say things like, "It feels like it was only yesterday that I could hold you in one hand!" as they see the brat walking 50 feet in front or behind them. They feel cheated because they did spend a large chunk of their lives devoted simply to keeping you alive and healthy, for the most part. This is, of course, assuming that they are good parents. There is no worse feeling for a child then to realise later on in his life that he has shit parents. Up until the age of 10 it is difficult for them to comprehend that their parents do anything wrong, let alone raised them badly. This is where childhood nightmares and trauma comes in. A recurring nightmare is a sign of persistent stress and where could the child be getting such stress if not at school? Their family but most notably their parents.

To a young child, parents signify who they must emulate. They are the people that the child wants to please in every way. There is nothing better than a "Well done!" or an "I'm proud of you!" in the eyes of any offspring, not just children. Unfortunately I think that most parents probably do not focus on what's right and tend to obsess on what's wrong and what needs to change. The problem with this is that the younger generation might start to feel like they are inadequate. One might say that I'm being overly sensitive, but am I? Really? Children are always listening. They are always attentive. They absorb everything. Proof of this is how a 7 year old English boy can come to Malta to visit relatives for a week and go back home knowing significantly more than a handful of Maltese words and phrases. If a child sees his parents fighting, they will absorb negativity. If the parents are happy, the child will be happy. The feelings that any person will absorb in childhood will be carried on throughout their life whether subconsciously or otherwise.

Do me a favour and if anyone here is a parent or is tempted to become one, please be careful how you act. I'm not saying that parents have to cater to their child's every whim, I'm saying that sometimes parents tend to forget just how much of an influence they have on the children themselves.

I hope that this post satisfied whoever asked me for it. If you want to ask specific questions and whatnot, I will gladly answer them either in a comment if they are simple or in a further post if I think they deserve elaboration.

Feel free to comment and suggest anything, the interwebz. Good afternoon.